Arghhh…. Screw it! I flung my pen unto the table, crashing myself onto the bed where I sink myself into the soft cuddle of inferiority, churning in me as exasperation slowly chewed me off bit by bit, until I started scrolling my phone as a diversion.
Instagram, twitter, then Youtube. Nothing interesting, I got up, drank a glass of water, rejuvenated, resumed with doing Maths.
Another half an hour flew past, I gave up, I could not solve that particular question. The next day, the following day, I did not do Maths at all. I was afraid of doing so. My greatest passion became my greatest fear.
It was not Maths that became my phobia, it was failure. I kept succumbing to failure, my brain did not want to try because it did not want to fail again and again, again and again, again and again.
I resumed this moribund passion of mine, relentless was I, pertinacity lost to failure once again. This cycle was repeating itself, becoming a habit of failing and not embracing it boldly.
Just do it. I told myself, sick and tired of the fear of failure which fled through the back doors of my heart because the beauty of Maths trumped failure. I am willing to fail as many times as possible in order to solve the problems in Maths.