Drunk, again. I was being the alcoholic that I used to be, using this drug to escape from all my realities that had shattered into a million pieces. Depression slunk into my comfort, draped me in his shadow. I kept myself together solely by alcohol, negating all the pain cast unto me in the past few days.
Could you imagine having all of that you loved slowly being picked off by death in a day? That was yesterday. We were having a wonderful outing to the lakeside house that we bought last summer, it was the first time we were here. Everything ran as planned, but something happened, I happened.
Three of us, me, my wife, and our child were taking a chill pill with the breath-taking view of the breaking dawn by the lakeside, a panoramic prospect of the golden-brown sky furbished with hints of the twinkling stars. I got into the house to get us a drink, a premonition stroke me before anything else. There was a black blotch on the cups which I saw in the dimly lit kitchen.
I tried washing it away, but it grew, it was alive. I dropped the cup immediately, the organism grabbed it before creating any additional noise. My mind prompted me to shout for help, too late, the black thing slithered into my mouth, trying to take command over my body.
Struggling was superfluous, the black organism was stronger than me, I succumbed to it reign over my body. The worse thing was that I was still conscious. I, it picked up a kitchen knife, slid it inside my back pocket. It, I filled up a cup of water, sauntered casually outside as if nothing had happened.
I was oblivious and shrouded in fear of what was about to happen, I tried to shout for once more, to no avail. It had me, control, everything. I was its pawn, ready, hungry for blood-shed. My wife smiled to me when I approached, she was still in the bliss of life, relishing every moment that she could, not knowing the next second would spell mortal peril to her.
It played the possible ways to kill my wife, at least a hundred, in my mind, my conscience was blown into bits, I did not know how to respond. My inner self was cocooned into a ball of fear, attempting to conceal all of the odious images that ran across my mind. Choose one. It told me, Choose, or else all. I did not respond.
I got closer to my wife, all. the monotonous voice strung the events into a satay of horror. I handed the cup of water to her, she smiled to me, I was crying for her to run from the inside. The knife was slowly retrieved from the other side of me, concealing it out of her view. As she was drinking the water, I thrust the knife into her mouth, impaling it deep enough to fracture her spinal nerve. She was immobilised, her demeanor was in total shock, she did not even have the time to switch to a fearful expression.
Crashing the cup into ground with my shoe, I picked up the shards from the floor, and carved my name all around her body as a signature of me killing her off. From the knee, thigh, stomach, chest, hands, neck, all of it was lacerated, blood red, with my name on it. Doing it with a Joker style words. I could not close my consciousness off from this, I had to witness everything.
My little child was still playing with himself, not knowing what was about to happen to him. I dragged her into the lake, drowned her off. I got into the car, revving up the engine, and the most brutal scene was played right through my mind, turning into reality after that instant. I rammed my car straight, at full speed, into my child who was frolicking in the greens. My child flew straight into the lake, drowning aside with his mother. The next moment was darkness.
I woke up at my old apartment, next to frames of bloodied family pictures. I killed them. The scenes of my doings were broadcast in my brain. Sadness, anger, fear veiled up inside me to the brim, I did not know how or what to react. My composure, my sanity was torn into pieces, and here I was, with my dear friend, alcohol, hoping that drinking would reverse this nightmare.