Willingly, I volunteered to march into this gauntlet, a pitch black arena where ends did not meet, at all. My heart was adamant to get through this path that I picked, my hands were trembling from the sweat profuse from my body. Breathing, still, I could still catch hold to my breath, not for long.
The advent of this atmosphere was unwelcoming, nauseating, wearying. I was still in oblivion of what was coming into my way. Premonitions were prominent, I turned a blind eye to them, everything was still pitch black to me.
Contours of dangers were impaled through the bodies of my nature, I was converting into someone, a something that I could not comprehend, that I could not imagine.
Slimy, I was splattered with murky substance, dissipating my life force, my energy. I could feel that I was dying from the inside out.
My days started to be numbered, I felt that my time was limited.
Those dark, dark days, I could not even see clearly about what, where I was initially heading. Confused, lost, flung into a constant motion of threading around.
I… I just do not know how to write anymore.
This is just too difficult for me, this choice that I have made taught me a major lesson, to think about the repercussions about my choices, I should not have chosen this path, I am held back by various kinds of impediments that were akin to chains bound to my very soul, tearing me into shreds, leaving me no way out of my poor decision making, giving me a, no future.
I could no longer see the light that was at the end of the tunnel that I used to see when I was younger. I was, I am so lost. The place is getting darker, I am getting slower, more tired, even destroyed. There was this limelight- it was darkness.
Talking to myself. Realising that I was overwhelmed by life and myself.
Hopefully, I get to break free, soon.