why. why.

my. my.

i am back in this state

the state where

hope and dreams

are pixelated.

the instantaneous escapes,

the immediate gratifications,

the almost too real

life that is present

in front of your very eyes

locked in the rectangular box

in an unending cycle of

refreshing,

re-watching,

renewing.

i am tired.

but i still want to watch

another Youtube video.

i am tired.

just another Youtube video

knowing very well that

i want to sleep

instead

just one more,

another one.

i am addicted

i am aware

but i can do no more than

staring into the pixelated reality.

tick tock.

4 hours gone into Youtube

watching videos

re-watching videos

learning nothing

learning something

entertaining sometimes

self-deprecating at times

the rest of the time

split attentions into Twitter

what a waste of time

why not waste it on me?

this is wasting time

into a thing

that is made-up.

why not waste all of the time

into me?

why are you neglecting me?

why are you so addicted to it?

am i joke to you?

i…

help me

God.

.

.

.

“Ask.”

Craving for more? Down below:
re: addict #17

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re: catharsis #15
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interrupted catharsis #13
No Time Left (November Goals)