do the right thing, at the right time, at the right place, for the right reason.

– Mr. Leong

Youth is never waiting, so as time. I am not any younger than I was yesterday, I am letting time slip away from time to time. Countless opportunities that laid right in front of me are waning into non-existence whilst I devote my time into things that are not worth my time.

I know, scrolling through social media, slouching around watching YouTube are two ominous acts that overthrow my opportunities and me into a perennial loop of wastage. Another one is not wanting to sleep when it is time to do so, I am fantastic at procrastinating sleep when my brain needs sleep the most as my day-to-day routine require a lot of thinking but yet, I simply ignore the fact that I need and want sleep.

One more thing, I stopped exercising. I just stopped doing things that are strenuous and beneficial to me.

Yes, this is where my thinking goes wrong, I should put the benefits or shortcoming first before the feelings of mine when doing things in life. I have numerous opportunities laid in front of me, I have to repeat to emphasize, and if I keep this life of mine on without any drastic changes, I will end up in the pit of nadir or rather conformity, eventually.

I need to align myself once again, if I want to make things happen.

Here is a short prayer.

Dear God,
I am at a place and time where things are not going right for me again, it is the same old problem, it is the problem of being me. God, I really need Your help in changing me, modifying me into a better person, who has a clearer aim at what I intend. No, not what I intend, but Your intentions. I believe God put me in these situations is to train me to become a more hardcore person in dealing with stuffs, no time to waste in goofing around, I really believe that You are challenging me to do more. But, I need Your strength to get rid of my time-wasting habit, which is to scroll through my phone whenever I have the chance to, I am losing concentration on a day-by-day basis. I know I should discard what is distracting and zero in my focus fully into what I am doing. All the things that You aligned me to do is good, I know for some reason that You are giving me the best avenue to learn, to give and to grow as a person. This is not a time for me to have fun, the balance must be there but time is never on my side, time for fun and games are way over for me, I must focus on my growth. Over-preparation is never going to be a let-down because I am preparing for more challenging adversaries in life. I am talking to myself again, I should put You first, I must. Why am I distancing myself from You again? I must get back, this is the last time that I am going to go through this kind of bullshit again, I must be doing the right thing, at the right time, at the right place, for the right reason. Although I might be reverting to my routine again once I leave this piece of mind, but I pray to You, God that You can help me win this spiritual war once and for all. I am sick and tired of playing games with the devil. Just let me out. Help me, Jesus. I need whatever You can provide to wipe out the devil that is residing in me or perhaps I am the devil, I need Your almighty help in getting rid of this wretch and breathing new wine in me. The indulgence that I am into is just superfluous and absurd, I must align my mind, my soul and my body to detox myself of the devil. I must get me back on track with Your help. Thank you Jesus for all the opportunities, if You feel like that I must learn the pain of losing the opportunities at hand, at least please let me put in the most of my efforts first before swatting away the opportunities in front of me. Thank You, Jesus.

Amen.

180219

Craving for more? Down below:
dancing with the shadows.
love so simple
The Chemist by Stephenie Meyer (Book Review)
burning a candle at both ends.
slipping into conformity.
End Of The Line?
Ornaments

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